Luncheon
The narrator, perhaps Maugham himself, describes seeing a woman
at the theater who he'd met twenty years prior. He says he would not have
recognized her if someone had not said her name. When she asks if he remembers
her, he begins to recount the story of their first meeting. Back then, he had a
tiny apartment in Paris, and she'd written to him about his book.
When she came through Paris the next week, she hoped he would
take her to lunch at an expensive restaurant. Though he had little money for the
month, he agreed, expecting to have a modest lunch. However, once he saw the
menu, he realized the prices were much higher than he'd anticipated, but she
assures him that he "never eat[s] anything for luncheon." She claims
to only eat one thing at lunch, and she asks about some salmon, which is not in
season (making it more expensive). Next, she orders caviar to nibble at while
she waits for her salmon. For himself, the narrator chooses the cheapest item
on the menu, a mutton chop, because he fears the inevitable bill.
Next, she orders some champagne, claiming that her doctor has forbidden her to drink anything but that. The narrator drinks water due to the expense. Next, she asks for some giant asparagus—an expensive specialty. When the narrator refuses some, she scolds him for ruining his palate with the red meat. Finally, she asks for some coffee and ice cream—and she accepts an Italian peach as well. She goes on and on, saying she's had only a "'snack'" and berating him for eating something so heavy as a chop. However, the narrator is miserable, thinking about the lean month he will have as a result of her luncheon. In the end, he feels he's had his revenge, as she now weighs nearly three hundred pounds; this is likely why he does not recognize her at the theater when he sees her!
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